LIVE: Malta Eurovision Song Contest 2017

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Albert Galea February 18, 20178:06 pm

Good evening audience! It seems that you, much like us, have nothing better to do with your Saturday night other than sit inside and watch what is one of Malta’s most followed appointments of the year! So sit back, and let us be your tongue in cheek guides for the night!

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20178:11 pm

Daniel’s shoes are brighter than my future.

Martina Mifsud February 18, 20178:11 pm

Daniel’s suit is the current highlight of the night

Albert Galea February 18, 20178:11 pm

So to run you through the night:

We’ve got 16 songs to get through tonight, and once that chore has been done, we get to vote on who we’re going to send on an all inclusive holiday to Ukraine for a week next May.

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20178:12 pm

Pantaloons. Nuff said.

Chase Zammit February 18, 20178:12 pm

HERE COME THE ADS.

Albert Galea February 18, 20178:12 pm

And let the adverts begin!

Albert Galea February 18, 20178:13 pm

These cut scenes are uncomfortably long…

Chase Zammit February 18, 20178:13 pm

Klinsmann looking 12 as ever!

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20178:13 pm

Klinsmann through the ages: From McFly to Regaine commercials

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20178:14 pm

L-editors ta’ dawk il-gazzetti registrati?

Albert Galea February 18, 20178:14 pm

First song of the night, Klinsmann Coleiro with Laserlight!

Martina Mifsud February 18, 20178:14 pm

Klinsmann’s singing is about as clear as my future

Albert Galea February 18, 20178:15 pm

That chair was stolen straight from KSU Common Room.

Chase Zammit February 18, 20178:16 pm

Props to Warren for choreo though!
Props to Klinsmann for not giving up!

Albert Galea February 18, 20178:17 pm

Raquella Dalli Gonzi is our second singer with Ray of Light.

Martina Mifsud February 18, 20178:18 pm

that dress looks like my gran’s table cloth

Chase Zammit February 18, 20178:19 pm

Whoever hairsprayed Raquela’s hair deserves the award.

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20178:19 pm

Continuing off from Martina’s, with this song, probably the only time she’ll be on top of the table. Sounds like the sound track to Spirit. That movie about a horse.

Albert Galea February 18, 20178:20 pm

We have discovered that Matteo has never watched The Lion King – in the words of a great politician: “SHAME ON YOU”

Martina Mifsud February 18, 20178:20 pm

Powerful voice on that one

Chase Zammit February 18, 20178:21 pm

With 5 song writers this song better be good.

Albert Galea February 18, 20178:21 pm

Deborah C & Joseph up next with the very originally named Tonight

Martina Mifsud February 18, 20178:21 pm

OH NO

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20178:21 pm

Sounds like an advert for Mea

dowlea

Albert Galea February 18, 20178:22 pm

GIANLUCA? IS THAT YOU?

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20178:22 pm

Sounds like an advert for Meadowlea

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20178:22 pm

Inb4 we get billboards of them telling us to wash our hands

Martina Mifsud February 18, 20178:22 pm

5 writers…are you kidding me??

Albert Galea February 18, 20178:23 pm

5 writers and all you can manage is copying the entry of 3 years ago?

Chase Zammit February 18, 20178:23 pm

So.. 5 songwriters came up with a children’s song.

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20178:23 pm

Jack and Jill fell off a hill, paid five writers for a song, and ended up with one of Gianluca Bezzina’s drafts

Martina Mifsud February 18, 20178:23 pm

I’d rather watch a Rocs advert on repeat than vote for this

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20178:24 pm

sponsored by Windows movie maker

Albert Galea February 18, 20178:25 pm

Kevin Borg up next, winner of the Swedish Idol nine years ago has since dropped off the radar a bit; but tonight he’s back with Follow

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20178:25 pm

Kevin Borg, like a discounted Made in China version of Kevin Jonas

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20178:27 pm

Women need functioning pant pockets too!

Albert Galea February 18, 20178:28 pm

Decent voice and all, but not exactly going to set Ukraine alight if he wins.

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20178:28 pm

Kevin goes Dragon Ball Z

Chase Zammit February 18, 20178:28 pm

HELLO SPIRTU S-SANTU

Albert Galea February 18, 20178:28 pm

I hope CABS didn’t see that bird going up in digital smoke right there otherwise we’ll be having trouble on our hands…

Chase Zammit February 18, 20178:28 pm

HONK HONK HONK !!!!!!

Martina Mifsud February 18, 20178:29 pm

Not even the Holy Spirit can make this song win

Albert Galea February 18, 20178:32 pm

Recap time – Office chairs, tablecloths, Gianluca Bezzina’s doppelganger and exploding doves!

It definitely hasn’t been an uneventful night so far!

Albert Galea February 18, 20178:37 pm

No Crosscraft adverts so far this year – PRAISE THE LORD!

Chase Zammit February 18, 20178:37 pm

67 commercials later :))))))

Martina Mifsud February 18, 20178:38 pm

Here we go again….

Martina Mifsud February 18, 20178:39 pm

The mic tape is annoying me beyond anything else

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20178:39 pm

Charles Borg done got shut down

Martina Mifsud February 18, 20178:39 pm

APPLY COLD WATER TO BURN

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20178:40 pm

‘Quasi-Almost-Made-It-Celebrities Read Mean Tweets’

Albert Galea February 18, 20178:41 pm

Straight out of Havana 808

Martina Mifsud February 18, 20178:41 pm

I was not ready for that intro…

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20178:42 pm

Did she borrow half her outfit from Thea Garret’s bird

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20178:43 pm

Her earrings are a low-key bluetooth earpiece

Chase Zammit February 18, 20178:43 pm

At least this kept us awake… love the SPUNK !

Chase Zammit February 18, 20178:43 pm

NICE HENNA BAE

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20178:43 pm

That was B.A.D. On the way to my ENT

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20178:44 pm

Get. Out.

Chase Zammit February 18, 20178:44 pm

OHHHHHHHH THEY’RE HIP! LOVELY DAB

Martina Mifsud February 18, 20178:44 pm

That note sounded like my pubescent younger brother

Albert Galea February 18, 20178:44 pm

I was about to say this wasn’t too bad for a Eurovision song. But then they ended on a dab. Why.

Martina Mifsud February 18, 20178:45 pm

I lost it at the Dab

Chase Zammit February 18, 20178:45 pm

Basic like yo tinsel dress

Albert Galea February 18, 20178:45 pm

I do love me some country music <3

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20178:46 pm

What is it with songs being nursery rhymes

Martina Mifsud February 18, 20178:46 pm

Carnival came a week earlier than expected

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20178:47 pm

She’s dressed like someone dancing at carnival back when Eileen presented it.

Martina Mifsud February 18, 20178:47 pm

I wish the outfit was So Simple

Albert Galea February 18, 20178:48 pm

Anything that has a man in a beret playing a banjo is pretty damn good in my book!

Martina Mifsud February 18, 20178:50 pm

FINALLY a song I don’t hate

Martina Mifsud February 18, 20178:50 pm

The backing track is giving me life

Albert Galea February 18, 20178:50 pm

Disney called, they want their song back…

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20178:51 pm

Theme song for most like-seeking teens in Malta?

Albert Galea February 18, 20178:51 pm

That being said – I actually like it

Chase Zammit February 18, 20178:52 pm

Nice voice and great performance but not a Eurovision ‘worthy’ song… whatever that means

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20178:53 pm

MISSING: Most male performers’ socks. kalzettigate

Chase Zammit February 18, 20178:53 pm

With a name like Rhiannon… you have to be fearless qalbi

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20178:55 pm

If she sold her earrings to Gram, she’d become a millionaire.

Chase Zammit February 18, 20178:55 pm

Very purtiera-esque earings

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20178:56 pm

Did my grandmother’s house get robbed by the whole costume department?

Albert Galea February 18, 20178:57 pm

Advert break perfectly coinciding with the time we have to go pick our pizza up. Fantastic. We will leave you in the capable hands of Chase and Martina for now.

Martina Mifsud February 18, 20179:07 pm

And we are back, Jesus take the wheel

Martina Mifsud February 18, 20179:08 pm

Ariana Grande wannabe much

Chase Zammit February 18, 20179:09 pm

Funtana toppu makes a comeback

Albert Galea February 18, 20179:09 pm

Me and Matteo have returned sans pizza sadly. We’ll rectify that after the next break.

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20179:10 pm

Party at the top, middle aged business woman at the bottom.

Martina Mifsud February 18, 20179:10 pm

Hello? Miriana the 90’s called, they want their cornrows back

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20179:11 pm

Dab again mofo. I dare you. I double dare you.

Martina Mifsud February 18, 20179:11 pm

Are those lights at the back or am I tripping on LSD??

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20179:12 pm

On the latest Culture-less Saga: Albert has not watched Pulp Fiction. Shame.

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20179:12 pm

One shoe to rule them all..

Martina Mifsud February 18, 20179:13 pm

getting some serious Morticia Adams vibes

Albert Galea February 18, 20179:13 pm

She’s got every 90s child’s dream – light up shoes!!!! (my 12 year old self is indeed jealous)

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20179:13 pm

Pretty sure she got lost on the way to Havana.

Chase Zammit February 18, 20179:14 pm

Only potential here is the up-sale for those shoes

Chase Zammit February 18, 20179:14 pm

Blah blah bye

Martina Mifsud February 18, 20179:15 pm

Here we go…Janice make us proud!

Albert Galea February 18, 20179:15 pm

It’s time for the people’s favourite – Janice Mangion with Kewkba

Albert Galea February 18, 20179:16 pm

The dream of every self-styled Maltese patriot – a Eurovision song sung in Maltese.

Martina Mifsud February 18, 20179:17 pm

the language, the subject matter, the dress….WE GET IT, YOU LOVE MALTA

Chase Zammit February 18, 20179:18 pm

Probably the winner. HOWEVER,we don’t have the political agenda to let us win with a Maltese song pero.

Amazing voice nonetheless

Albert Galea February 18, 20179:18 pm

It’s a nice song, and a really nice voice and we are pretty sure that this will win on the basis that it’s sung in Maltese – but we’re not sure it’s Eurovision material…

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20179:19 pm

Great voice, can’t win internationally though

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20179:19 pm

Cherton, Ukraine.

Martina Mifsud February 18, 20179:20 pm

I’m fighting to survive this night…

Albert Galea February 18, 20179:21 pm

We have spent the whole night debating on the proper pronunciation of this singer’s name…and we still don’t have a concrete answer…

Chase Zammit February 18, 20179:21 pm

Love her shoesie

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20179:22 pm

Oh look, someone who obviously wanted to be Slash.

Martina Mifsud February 18, 20179:22 pm

Her voice sounds like an out of tune violin getting BBQ’ed on the sun

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20179:22 pm

Oh, and he left.

Albert Galea February 18, 20179:23 pm

Mela, pizza run take 2.

Martina Mifsud February 18, 20179:24 pm

My ears are still ringing…

Martina Mifsud February 18, 20179:28 pm

Albert you may despair, I told you there was a Crosscraft add

Martina Mifsud February 18, 20179:32 pm

And we have arrived at long last to the last set of songs for this night

Martina Mifsud February 18, 20179:33 pm

Daniel’s suit is still the highlight of my night

Martina Mifsud February 18, 20179:34 pm

It’s called Serkin, you uncultured swine

Chase Zammit February 18, 20179:35 pm

BOMBSHELL started with a bang … bless

Martina Mifsud February 18, 20179:36 pm

Ponytails are really making a appearance tonight

Chase Zammit February 18, 20179:36 pm

Props to Yada’s Elaine Falzon for the choreo!

Martina Mifsud February 18, 20179:38 pm

I don’t hate it but I don’t like it either

Chase Zammit February 18, 20179:38 pm

Love it! Something different… well done Maxine!

Albert Galea February 18, 20179:38 pm

Very eurovision-y

Martina Mifsud February 18, 20179:40 pm

Sweet song, but not really winning material

Chase Zammit February 18, 20179:41 pm

Falling asleep on my pizza in 3..2..1

Albert Galea February 18, 20179:42 pm

Cute song on a romantic dinner or something, not Eurovision material though I’m afraid.

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20179:42 pm

There should be a rule that ex-winners aren’t allowed to participate again.

Martina Mifsud February 18, 20179:43 pm

the only spunk in the whole performance is Richard’s earring

Albert Galea February 18, 20179:43 pm

Ah, another favourite now – Brooke with Unstoppable

Martina Mifsud February 18, 20179:45 pm

Light effects brighter than my future

Chase Zammit February 18, 20179:45 pm

Her stage presence tho

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20179:46 pm

They do say that if a pigeon leaves its droppings on you it’s good luck. Hairband or bird shit?

Albert Galea February 18, 20179:46 pm

Yawnnnnnnn

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20179:47 pm

Resilience is key

Albert Galea February 18, 20179:47 pm

The poster girl for determination, Claudia Faniello, then to close off the night for us with Breathlessly

Chase Zammit February 18, 20179:48 pm

Nice wedding dress

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20179:49 pm

She’s only 28.

Martina Mifsud February 18, 20179:49 pm

Snooze fest

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20179:49 pm

Bright side, if she loses, she’s got her wedding dress sorted

Chase Zammit February 18, 20179:49 pm

She tries so hard miskina… but still too boring

Albert Galea February 18, 20179:49 pm

As is normally the case with anything Claudia Faniello – very nice but too slow for it’s own good

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 20179:51 pm

If you looked up bodacious, you’d get Claudia. What a woman.

Chase Zammit February 18, 201710:01 pm

We have 15 mins to decide who we’re gonna dump money on ๐Ÿ™‚

Chase Zammit February 18, 201710:02 pm

VOTING OPEN NIES … WASTE YO CREDIT

Albert Galea February 18, 201710:03 pm

Apologies for that 10 minute hiatus – my brother arrived home and elected to put on roughly 63 appliances all at once, hence tripping the fusebox and leaving us feeling like the Victorian Age all over again.

Martina Mifsud February 18, 201710:05 pm

MAKE IT STOP

Chase Zammit February 18, 201710:07 pm

Fave outfit- Cherton
Fave dance- Maxine
Fave performance- Brooke
Fave voice- Janice

Albert Galea February 18, 201710:07 pm

YESSSS

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 201710:07 pm

Finally, decent music.

Albert Galea February 18, 201710:07 pm

FINALLY SOME GOOD MUSIC DEO GLORIA

Martina Mifsud February 18, 201710:09 pm

I’m half of the Spotify pays for this song semplicita

Albert Galea February 18, 201710:09 pm

Spotify xejn – I own the EP! Absolutely love these guys!

Martina Mifsud February 18, 201710:09 pm

I’m half of the Spotify plays for this song semplicita

Martina Mifsud February 18, 201710:10 pm

That accent melts my ice cold heart

Albert Galea February 18, 201710:15 pm

The fact that there is no jury vote this year presents an interesting problem for the Maltese people…

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 201710:15 pm

AHAHAHHA – ahahaha – ahah – no.

Albert Galea February 18, 201710:16 pm

That problem being that when we inevitably don’t win, we can’t blame the foreigners for choosing the wrong song.

Martina Mifsud February 18, 201710:17 pm

The recaps will forever haunt my dreams

Albert Galea February 18, 201710:19 pm

Ok so after this saga, it’s time to see who we all think will win…

Chase Zammit February 18, 201710:21 pm

Top 3 Prediction (random order):
Unstoppable, Kewkba, Follow me (not my personal favourites tho)

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 201710:21 pm

The nation has decided who shall get the most glorified holiday of the year

Albert Galea February 18, 201710:21 pm

We’ve come to a unanimous conclusion that Janice Mangion’s Kewkba will win this – although it isn’t everyone’s favourite song.

Albert Galea February 18, 201710:22 pm

As if a week in a country torn up by civil war and foreign military intervention can be considered as a desirable holiday…

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 201710:23 pm

“tajjeb ghax tajjeb, u tajjeb ghax b’xejn”

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 201710:23 pm

*shoves banana in purse during a buffet*

Albert Galea February 18, 201710:28 pm

We’ve had 300 people tune into this live feed tonight…that’s 300 people with no life just like us! Great to see that we aren’t alone ๐Ÿ˜€

Chase Zammit February 18, 201710:34 pm

Feeling Narnia

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 201710:35 pm

Gladiator cum Jackson 5?

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 201710:36 pm

Party like a Saturday – at Valletta – till 8.30

Albert Galea February 18, 201710:37 pm

“Like we’re partying on a Saturday” – and how would you know what that feels like eh Sinjorina?

Chase Zammit February 18, 201710:38 pm

IRA’S BACK… for 5 mins

Martina Mifsud February 18, 201710:38 pm

Here she comes

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 201710:38 pm

End. Of. An. Ira.

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 201710:40 pm

Look, our home-grown talent (we only seem to have one) can be a baby momma, play the piano, AND sing. Cancel the festival. Send her to Ukraine.

Albert Galea February 18, 201710:40 pm

The digital faces are back!!!

Albert Galea February 18, 201710:41 pm

Martina is singing along with the song…I won’t risk joining in as we just cleaned the windows in here and it would break my heart to break one with my singing…

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 201710:41 pm

Xkupa u pala

Martina Mifsud February 18, 201710:41 pm

Better than all of the crap we heard tonight by a long shot

Chase Zammit February 18, 201710:42 pm

Say what you want…Ira is one of the best singers we have

YOU GO GIRLY

Martina Mifsud February 18, 201710:42 pm

PETER BORG!!!!! God bless you, you beautiful human being

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 201710:42 pm

THE UNDERTAKER

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 201710:43 pm

Oh never mind

Albert Galea February 18, 201710:43 pm

If Ira couldn’t win the Eurovision…then none of the 16 songs that we heard tonight will. Fact.

Martina Mifsud February 18, 201710:45 pm

This performance is the official highlight of my night, though Peter Borg is like 90% of the reason

Chase Zammit February 18, 201710:47 pm

HAMMIEMA FAQA

Martina Mifsud February 18, 201710:47 pm

FAQA?????????

Albert Galea February 18, 201710:47 pm

Who uses the word “Faqa” anymore come on…

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 201710:47 pm

Legend has it, she’s just writing her new grime album

Martina Mifsud February 18, 201710:48 pm

She is so awkward, bless

Chase Zammit February 18, 201710:48 pm

Someone give her cue cards next time pls

Chase Zammit February 18, 201710:48 pm

Let there not be a next time pls

Albert Galea February 18, 201710:48 pm

ALTA TENSIONE

Martina Mifsud February 18, 201710:49 pm

DRUM-ROLL PLEASE

Albert Galea February 18, 201710:50 pm

The tension is palpable

Chase Zammit February 18, 201710:50 pm

THIRD PLACE BE FOLLOW – KIF HIJ?

Albert Galea February 18, 201710:50 pm

3rd place – Kevin Borg and his exploding bird!

Albert Galea February 18, 201710:51 pm

2nd place….

Albert Galea February 18, 201710:52 pm

WHAT

Albert Galea February 18, 201710:53 pm

We did not expect this at all

Martina Mifsud February 18, 201710:53 pm

HOLY CRAP WHAT

Chase Zammit February 18, 201710:53 pm

SECOND PLACE BE KEWKBA- WTF SO WHO’S THE WINNER?????

Albert Galea February 18, 201710:53 pm

Janice Mangion takes second place with Kewkba!

Martina Mifsud February 18, 201710:53 pm

I’M SHOOK

Chase Zammit February 18, 201710:53 pm

Currently under shock.

Albert Galea February 18, 201710:54 pm

MOMENT OF TRUTH

Chase Zammit February 18, 201710:54 pm

Poor Matt had already started photoshopping Janice as the winner lol

Martina Mifsud February 18, 201710:55 pm

O.O

Albert Galea February 18, 201710:55 pm

EJJA AQLAGHHA

Albert Galea February 18, 201710:55 pm

AND THE WINNER IS

Albert Galea February 18, 201710:56 pm

WHATTTTTTTTTTTTT

Albert Galea February 18, 201710:56 pm

CLAUDIA FANIELLO!!!

Martina Mifsud February 18, 201710:56 pm

NO FUCKING WAY

Chase Zammit February 18, 201710:56 pm

HOW WHAT

CLAUDIA NOT SO FINALI

Chase Zammit February 18, 201710:56 pm

WELL DONE PUPA- nth time is the charm!!!!!!!

Chase Zammit February 18, 201710:57 pm

So….. who else is shocked af?

Albert Galea February 18, 201710:57 pm

Claudia Faniello – proof that determination does indeed pay off

Albert Galea February 18, 201710:58 pm

Well, that was a roller-coaster and a half…

Martina Mifsud February 18, 201710:58 pm

I’m speechless…

Chase Zammit February 18, 201711:00 pm

A lot of wasted money, confused presenters, and one breathless winner! ;)))

Albert Galea February 18, 201711:02 pm

An ending that left us breathless that’s for sure…

Chase Zammit February 18, 201711:02 pm

The real question is … where is Fabrizio?

Chase Zammit February 18, 201711:03 pm

Good night nies x

Albert Galea February 18, 201711:05 pm

Right, that’s all the breath-related puns out of our system

Matteo Alessandro February 18, 201711:07 pm

I’ll be back. The Matteo-nator.

Albert Galea February 18, 201711:07 pm

And with that, it’s time to bid you all adieu for tonight.

Albert Galea February 18, 201711:13 pm

It’s been a night of drama, screaming, zany costumes, exploding poultry and in the end; a most unexpected winner. It’s been fantastic commentating for you and thank you so much for following our live blog throughout the night! See you in May!

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